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Archive for June, 2013

Wind Up Here

The name of a toy store I once knew. Combined with “How the fuck did I” it’s an apt description of my current situation. Today I awoke with a heavy heart because I’m suddenly aware, after nearly a year of fog veil, that my life once again is not right, I need not only to change myself within my own life but also to change the people who are in my life. I’ve got to be nurtured, I’m still too much a young soul to be tortured and tainted by insidious forces that I can easily manage.

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To all the boys who came before the one who snores beside me now, I wish I could be everywhere at once so I could see you each, fast forwarded to this point in time. Every one of you has given me so much and shaped the way I grow and change. Some more than others, but I’m finding out that you each contributed greatly to this life, leading me places I might never have sought without your influences.
Sometimes I miss someone’s sweet smile, or the environment that surrounded us as a couple…restaurants we frequented, friends we shared, discussions and explorations unique to each of our particular places in time that can never be captured, but comes to me in a flash and brings shiny water to threaten a waterfall from my eyes…
I thank you…
Still the same girl you all once knew, with a piece of each one of you.

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